Friday, June 02, 2006

Playing to Pro (Bracelet Time LOL!)

Online Poker

I have registered to play in the PokerStars World Blogger Championship of Online Poker!

This Online Poker Tournament is a No Limit Texas Holdem event exclusive to Bloggers.

Registration code: 3694857

Play Like a Champion Today

Friday, May 19, 2006

Twenty Questions

1. What is the biggest mistake people make at a NL table?

Sitting at the same table as me.

2. What is the biggest mistake people make at a Limit table?

Only pussies play Limit.

3. Why do you play poker?

Because I’m good at it, and I love money. It’s also a good way to let people know how good I am at something win I hit it big.

4. If you weren't playing poker, what would you be doing?

Drinking Buds and playing Cricket.

5. What is your favorite poker book and why?


6. Who is your favorite poker player and why?

Hellmuth because he can read his opponents well. I also like Raymer and Hachem and Ivey. I really think Ivey is the Tiger Woods of poker.

7. Which poker player do you dislike the most and why?

I just hate tourists and fish that stick around til the river and keep hitting LOL!

8. Do your coworkers know about your blog?

Yeah, most of them think its pretty cool and they like to read my tips and strategy.

9. What is the most you have won in a cash game or MTT (both live and online)?

I can’t remember too many Buds LOL! Seriously it was a lot one night where I got going really good and pretty much dominated the table. I’d say maybe $1000 at a NLHE$50 table.

10. What is the most you have lost in a cash game or in one day total (both live and online)?

Some tourist hit a miracle and took about a $100 from me once. Of course I got it back when he didn’t believe me when I had the goods. Don’t bluff a bluffer is what my grandpa always said. That and Son I’m gonna go fuck your grandma a good one.

11. Who was your first poker blog read?

Dutch Boyd and YosoyVeneno. I also like reading Miss Maudie.

12. What satisfies you more, your aces holding up for a big pot or a bluff working for a big pot?

Well, since I NEVERBLUFF LOLLOL!! I guess it would be aces. I’m just sick of all the trout catching rivers on my big hands so I would love it when my aces held up.

13. Why do you blog?

Because it’s a journey. And I think to go pro we all need to help each other and share the things we’ve learned. It’s helped me focus just to see all the others focused, and if we’re their for each other then good things will happen. I like sharing my tips and strategy that I’ve learned, and I really think the ship will come home one day and I’ll be on the beach drinking umbrella drinks showing off my shiny bracelet to ladies and living the life of a world champion.

14. Do you read blogs from an RSS reader like bloglines or do you visit each blog?

I don’t know what RSS is, but I do like to visit blogs. I like it when people comment on my blog too except for the hate. Like I said we all need to stay focused and its hard when there are haters bringing down our journey to pro. My two favorite blogs are Jordan and StruggleBogey LOL!!

15. Would you rather play poker for a living than do what you currently do for a living?

Of course. And its only a matter of time. My goal is to play at the NL$1000 table by December. That way if I ONLY win half of my stack I’m up $500. 500 x 300 is $150000 which I can live off of easy. The other 65 days a year I’ll probaby be spending all my winnings on a beach LOL!!

16. Do you wear a tin foil hat on occasion?

No, but Tommy has an old fishing hat with hooks and lures on it that we make fun of him for wearing to the poker table. He says its lucky and that he can tell if someone is bluffing him if they get all caught up staring at his 1957 Wall-Eyed Jibbler.

17. If you had to pin it down to one specific trait, what does a great poker player have (or do) that separates them from an average player?

You just have to be the champion you want to be. Some people are born with it, some people aren’t. I was lucky to be born with it and last time I was home I really thanked my parents for that. I keep telling my dad that it is all one big session and the only way to get there is to keep on going with what I know. And that is Poker.

18. Is Drizz the coolest person on the planet for naming his baby Vegas?

I thought about doing that too, and I probably thought about it a long time before Drizz did LOL! But that’s cool. I liked Cody for the boy, and we went with Jessup as the middle name. I told Crystal he could go by CJ that way if he wanted to but I think he likes Cody. I think its good to give kids options so they don’t get all worked up and go off and do crank or kill someone.

19. What is your primary poker goal and are you close to accomplishing it?

To be a World Champion. Yes I think I’m very close. I’m only one tourney away from it LOL!!

20. What is your primary online site and why?

Doyle’s. So many fish there it should be illegal. There are so many fish that play there it makes me wonder if they stocked the pond LOLLOL!!

21. What site do you dislike and why? Let’s face it, they say what they want even if it isn’t the truth. Of course the President isn’t going to tell us EVERYTHING LOL!!! What good would our insiders and spies and FBI be if everyone knew what they did? I know what I know about poker and life, and if it gets me to the final table with all the flashing lights then that’s all I want. All this stuff about politics is just stupid anyway. Tommy told me once that if I kept my eye on the prize, and stayed focused that my one big long session would finally pay off. I believe him and you should too. Remember that.

Tuesday, April 04, 2006

The Tourist

Seven full hours of playing perfect poker and what do I have to show for it?
Nothing. At every single point in the tourney I knew that I was easily the best player at the table.

Fucking tourists.

It's all one long session you have to keep telling yourself.
Blah, blah, blah, fucking blah.

Nope, it's true. In the end, it is I who is The Tourist.
I'm just passing through folks. Don't mind me one bit.

It all started about four months ago. I guess you could say I was bored. Bored with poker, bored with poker blogs, bored with life, and bored with being bored. That's when I decided to jump into character and create good ole NeverBluff. That's right. Everything sure seemed normal in my daily walk, but one day reality slapped me around something good. My best friend was diagnosed with lung cancer, and started chemotherapy treatments immediately thereafter. This was fucking real. Something so completely real in a world that I had populated with reading blogs, playing poker, chatting online, reading books, and whatever else it was that I was doing to keep me distracted from actual living.

The news was powerful, and so close to home that the only way I could deal with it was to completely ignore it. I played more poker, and read more books, and subscribed to more blogs, and then one day finally decided to start up the blog that you're reading now. It was simply to serve as an outlet. One that I could tap into for my daily fix of simple childish poke-fun laughter and your standard dark, deprived, and debaucherous humor.

I always thought that a blog would surface one day and all of our fears would be realized. The internet had finally reached that guy. He's out there, folks, and I think that's where NeverBluff garnered a lot of his legitimacy. People know people like him. A complex parody combining every obnoxious personality trait that you could imagine. Couple this with an easily accessible medium, and voila!

The 21st century has given anyone and everyone a soapbox.

I've wanted to cut Champ off at the pass more than once, but was deterred by friends and readers who still liked tuning in to his madness every day. Everyone had their reasons for stopping by. I think some people came by because although his style was rough around the edges, he was still amusing and entertaining. I'm sure some came by to readily disagree with the most recent off color topic du jour. Some may have even checked in to feel good about their own lives comparatively using NeverBluff as a benchmark for "pathetic and utterly hopeless."

I like a good prank as much as anyone, but on my end, it was getting a bit old. Continued correspondence with very good people while pretending to be some backwoods dumbshit is a bit silly anyway. There never really was a "road map" for Poker Champ. I breathed a little life into him, and he just kinda took off.

Last week we got the good news that the chemotherapy had worked. My friend is in the clear for the time being, but still requires monthly exams for the next six months to make sure the beast doesn't return. He's smoked for the better part of his life and still remains a high risk candidate for the disease.

The real world is a motherfucker sometimes.

NeverBluff may serve to some as a reminder to not take anything too seriously. If some feathers were ruffled or panties bunched in the process, so be it. No harm was truly intended, and hopefully those that found themselves in Champ's crosshairs can appreciate some good old fashioned dark humor.

If you still want to hate, I've got a big blue veiner you can gag on. LOL!!

So, the next time a blog surfaces that's "too fat and juicy" to be true, it probably is. Well, maybe not the next time, because that will be me too, but the time after that for sure.

Play Like a Champion Today.

Monday, April 03, 2006


I got some emails from players that have been where I've been and I got a special email from one of my favorite bloggers Iggy from Guinness and Poker asking me to play in the blogger tourney for the world series. I've played in a blogger tourney before and they are fun to play with some of the best. Some of the worst too LOL!! Ask Jordan about sucking out on me in the headsup!! LOL!! Anyway, it feels good to know that the real professional poker bloggers who take it seriously think that I've got what it takes. Tonight I'm going to show everyone I've got what it takes and that this will be my first step to that bracelet.

Play Like a Champion Tonight LOL!!


Has it been a full week already since I last put up a post?
Let's just say it has been tough.

I am SICK AND TIRED of tourists catching their river. I have had more bad beats in the past 2 weeks that it is making me looney. I just have to keep telling myself it is one big session, but that is hard. Fish and tourists who have no business keep making hands when I'm way ahead. It furiates me to no end, and it really is just like the real world sometimes. I don't have much time to talk because poker has taken a backseat to the real world. Me and Kelly are officially over. I kept calling her but she never answered. Finally Tommy got through to her by talking to her friend who he still bangs and I got to talk to her on the phone for five minutes. It basically ended with me telling her she was a stupid bitch like all the rest of them. All the same. There are more fish in the sea, and I definitely don't have time for one bad apple to ruin my whole bunch. Also, Cody had a bad run-in with the fireplace yesterday. Tripped and hit face first into the base of it and knocked out 5 of his top teeth. Cracked them all off, and they had to cap them and he's not real happy about it. He got 6 stitches in his lip too, and he really looks like a mess. Just imagine that kid when he starts drinking beer if he can't even keep on his feet sober LOL!!! Anyway, he's going to be fine, and I think if it doesn't kill you it only makes you stronger anyway. So it should be good for him in the long run. Crystal says that's why I don't get him but once every two weeks, but that bitch is so stupid she doesn't know anyway. He could play Playstation at my house or play with Pete's boys, or I guess he could just sit around at Crystals with her and her man and see how much crank they can all do. I am fed up with all of them, and it really does go all the way back to Eve and the apple LOL!!

I took a gash when I was 16 in my leg that had 47 stitches once from hopping a barbwire in a field. Caught me on the backside and opened it right up. I bled like a stuck pig for the whole ride to the hospital and passed out on the way. My friend Eric was driving me in his truck and never did get the bloodstains out. I couldn't walk on it for about a week but it ended up making me stronger in the end.

With all this shit that's going on I really think it makes us stronger without killing us like the saying goes. I guess you could say that poker is like that since you get to bounce back after all the beats. It sometimes doesn't seem like it because you get so pissed when they go runner-runner, but those are the people you want to play. They will pay you off in the long run, and they are the building blocks to go pro. It is tough to keep telling yourself that, believe me, I know. I bet I've taken more bad beats in the last month than pretty much anyone out there. At least at Doyle's and Stars. You got to take a break for a few minutes. Go for a walk, or just take a minute off the game. I'll take it out on the heavy bag for a few minutes, and that with a good walk usually gets me toned down pretty good. Anything that can relieve the stress that bad beats cause is good. It is a LONG haul, and if you go off the deep end you'll never be able to reach shore. I have been swimming in the poker waters for a year almost the deep end could have easily sucked me under just like those fish keep sucking me out with river catches.

If it doesn't kill you IT WILL MAKE YOU STRONGER. I promise.

Play Like a Champion Today.

Monday, March 27, 2006

Ups and Downs

I guess you could say I had an up and down weekend. Lots of shit went down, and it's really hard for me to put it alltogether. Of course I can't write about it all, but let's just say that I won my cricket tourney, and that I finished third in the poker tourney. We had 8 players and of course I got sucked out on. It never gets old LOL!

Also, I guess me and Kelly may be finished too. We got together Friday night and I took everyones advise and told her about Cody. It caught her pretty good by surprise, and get this, she also didn't know how old I was!! She said that I told her I was only 30 at the concert. I don't remember doing that but it could've happened because me and Tommy drank all day long. So, she was pissed about that, and kept on saying "If you lied about your age and waited to tell me about the boy that she would never know if I was lying or had something else to hide." I was pretty sad about the whole thing, but then realized that they're all the same. It would've ended sometime anyway soon because she just wasn't getting it. What do I have to hide I asked her? I told her I didn't want to hide anything because that's why I told her about Cody. I tried to keep dodging the subject of my age because I'm almost 40 and I told her I was 30. I probably thought I'd get away with it since at first I just thought she was a stupid chick who would believe me.

Anyway, so at least I still got poker !! LOL!! Like Tommy said too that there are other fish in the sea. We're just in Louisville and think about how many other girls are out there. We can pretty much go out and pick up chicks whenever we want and if we run out in Louisville we could always move LOL!! That's right. I asked her if she could ever see me again and she just said she didn't know for sure. I thought about it alot and I'd like to see her again, but if I don't it won't ruin me. She was hot, and she liked to party, and she was cool, but if it wasn't meant to be then that's that. If something is meant to be it will happen. That's just the way things work and I can't go and change them. We were at BW3 when we talked and my last words to her were "Well, if you see me winning a bracelet and a millon dollars on TV don't even try to come running back." I said it as kind of a joke, but not really. She just walked away. I always thought that having cool last words really means a lot. If it's with your dad, or your wife, or if you're dying I think that its important to have cool last words that mean something. I believe 100% in reincarnation, but that you live one life at a time. And your last words are like the last chapter in a book. It can't end perfectly unless you end them with perfect words.

The whole Kelly thing got me thinking the rest of the week, but it obviously didn't bum me out too bad because I won the cricket tourney and should have won the poker tourney. Poker really is like relationships because she was a hand that I called a raise with, but my river didn't help me. There was another big raise and I had to fold. Think about it. I've still got chips in front of me and I got plenty more hands to play. I also got plenty more girls to be with before its all said and done with. Life is a journey, and like I tell everyone It is one big session. You have to treat it like that or you'll go broke. What happens then? That's right. You got to move on to another game, or give up the game for good. I always try to keep chips on the table and make sure I have outs to get the nuts. You will always get paid off, but you can't get paid off if your broke and can't play the hand. Remember that.

Play Like a Champion Today.

Thursday, March 23, 2006

Kicking Ass.

Yup, that's been me lately.
So, I decided to take a day to myself yesterday so I cracked open some Buds and broke out the dartboard. We've got our first big cricket tourney here this weekend and I wanted to make sure I was practiced up.

So, what's your record for most bulls in a row?

Mine is now nine. And when I finally missed I hit three more in a row LOL!!

If I wasn't kicking so much ass playing poker I'd really think about trying to go pro playing cricket. The pay isn't as good though, and the players aren't nearly as famous. I just found out from my boss that our group (the one I'm the head of) is doing so good that we may branch out and start up in either Cincinnati or St. Louis. I would get a choice to go to either, but I'm not sure if I will. It's not for sure yet, and when it is for sure it won't happen for 6 months. I'd hate to leave all the guys even though it's not that far away. I also get a bonus if I decide to take the job in the other cities. That would be cool, but I'm really starting to fall in love with Louisville. I'm thinking some of that has to do with Kelly. I'm thinking about telling her about Cody this weekend when I give her the necklace. Part of me wants to tell her everything but I'm also scared she may leave if she finds out I have a kid. That's probably why I won't tell her. The way I figure it what she doesn't know won't kill her. Besides she'll find out one day down the road sooner or later I think I'd just rather have her more in love with me when she does. I can not lose this woman. She is the greatest thing that's ever happened to me, and I would give up cricket and football and poker and everything to be with her. Okay, maybe not poker LOL!! Just kidding.

I played in 2 sitandgos last night on Doyle's. I was going to play another 45 person for Jordan's but didn't know how much time I had for sure, and it turned out I had enough time but didn't know it.

Do you ever have the choice to make like I did yesterday with cricket or poker? You really want to be the best at both and you feel that if you play one to practice to be the best your not giving your best at the other since your not playing it? That's the way I feel sometimes. I really want to be great at both, but sometimes I feel like I need to choose one if I want to become a master of it. That's why I chose poker months ago. Don't get me wrong I still love to play cricket and I'm still the best out of our group, and pretty much the best I've seen out of everyone who plays at our bar, but poker is really my thing. I've known this since I played my first hand. If it's special and meant to be you will just know it. I still remember when Kelly turned around to meet me at the Kid Rock concert and I talked to her. She completely blew me away with her smile and body. Without a doubt I know she is my soul mate.

And you can guarantee that when I win that bracelet and the cameras show me running into the crowd she'll be the one there cheering me on. I just know it.

Life couldn't get any better right now because my poker game is as good as it's ever been and I really feel like I'm one of the best out there not just at Doyles but wherever I play. Like I said you really have to act and play like a true champion if you want to be a champion. I know one thing and that's I wouldn't want to play me in poker LOL! Unless your scared of poker chips because I will take them from you and make things right !! Thanks for everyone who isn't hating in the comments, I really feel like if we're all serious about going pro its going to take help from each other. It's a long journey, but if we stay focused I know we will make it.

Play Like a Champion Today.

Wednesday, March 22, 2006

Winning Streak

I guess you could say that I'm a winning streak.
I'm starting to build up a pretty good relationship with Kelly and we're going on our third date this weekend, and get this, she said for our fourth date she'd go to Ceaser's with me. That's right.

Poker has been very nice to me lately. The games at Doyles are a gold mine and I've already moved up to NL$100. Last night I played at a 100NL table and was only there for 30 minutes when I hit pockets 88 and tripped them up on the flop. The guy caught his king and bet the pot. There were two hearts and I didn't want him to suck out so I raised all-in. He called and I got his entire stack. Not less than 5 minutes later I get pocket rockets, that's right, and this guy raises before the flop. I don't want him going anywhere so I just reraise the minimum. The flop comes with a King, and without thinking he just goes all in. If you read my post yesterday I said he could've hit his trips and if he would have I would go broke. I called with my AA and he had Ace-King and went broke again. He said in the chat that I was a lucky SOB, but that's the thing you get lucky sometimes. I didn't suck out on him, but getting pockets that hold up can be lucky. I had $392 when I got up and that my friends is a good session for less than one hour of work LOL!

If you want to really know where luck comes into play you have to do what I've been saying and that's to treat each session as part of the BIG session. The day you finally take up poker that's the beginning of your long session. You will get sucked out on, because that just happens when you play with the tourists at Doyles and Stars. But, getting sucked out on will get canceled out by all the times your pockets hold up like my AA did. When that cancels out all you have left is pure poker playing. And that's where you decide the winners and losers. It really does seem simple to put it that way but it's the truth. All the greats have suckouts, and all the greats get lucky sometimes when their hands hold up. But what makes them great? That's right, everything in between. And they are focused.

If you want to watch a real tournament player in action come see me at Stars. I won't post my name because I don't want the entire world taking notes, but you can find it if you go to Jordan's 45 SNG page. People there are more fish at Stars than in the entire ocean. Once Doyle's dries up that's where I'll be heading for most of my poker.

Poker tournament Saturday in the garage, and our first ever Cricket tourney right after. I don't like to make predictions, but everyone knows I'm the favorite to win both. I'm making my uncle's chili, and Tommy is bringing over 100 wings from BW3. One hundred!! That's right, that's how we do it.

Friday night is just me and my girl. I picked her up a necklace at the mall jewrly store yesterday after work and I plan to give it to her at dinner Friday. I'm also thinking about writing something maybe a poem, but I'll admit I'm kind of nervous about that. Anyway, I think she'll like the necklace, or at least I hope she does. You should see this girl smile. I get tears in my eyes when she smiles it is so beautiful.

Don't forget about the tits either because this girl is LOADED. LOL!!! I may be a softie at heart, but when it comes to the bedroom it's all fireworks. What's right is right and when I'm on my game let me tell you something, they always come back for more. So yeah, I'm pretty much looking forward to this weekend. Kelly, poker, darts, BW3 wings, and more March Madness. Now tell me that prayers don't get answered LOL!

I hope all your wings are fat and juicy like mine LOL!
I hope all your bullseyes are open and clean like mine LOL!
I hope all your pots are fat and juicy like mine too!!!

Play Like a Champion Today.